Hey you, I see you, do you see me?
She comes to me with a question:
“I don’t feel good,” she says.
“I give of myself and wish everyone well.
I don’t seek the spotlight. I’m not shy, I have a sense of humor, and everyone likes me.
They enjoy having me around… and yet… I don’t get invited to things like birthday parties… or just to drop by.
On my birthday, I get messages via Facebook and WhatsApp, but no one comes over… or sends a card.
Then they say: ‘Oh, that’s terrible… I forgot your birthday… oh well… I’m thinking of you now, aren’t I?'”
She lowers her eyes. “It feels like they’ve forgotten me lately.
Only when I reach out do I hear… ‘Oh, it’s great to speak to you; it’s a shame we can’t see each other.
We’ll meet up as soon as we’re allowed to see each other again, and do something fun together.’
I’ve stopped counting on it.
You’re born and you die, that’s the only certainty.
You know… I have a great job and colleagues; I’m appreciated. I’m always there for them—thinking ahead, helping out—but when I ask for help… there’s no one to help me or look ahead with me.
It’s as if they don’t see me, as if I’m being forgotten. Like I’m invisible. Shrouded in mist.
It troubles me, and it makes me sad.
Do I matter to others? Do I really matter?
I certainly matter to myself. I’m strong, I have fun, I enjoy life, I laugh a lot, I have girlfriends, and yet… It gnaws at me.
It feels confusing. Everything is jumbled in my head.”
Together, we went looking for where things were getting stuck. We walked for miles, pausing to reflect and talk.
Step by step, we drew closer. We peeled back the layers.
Now, there is balance between giving and taking. She knows where the feeling comes from.
She does only the things that truly make her happy. Moving into the future step by step, with her eyes on what lies ahead. She is like a diamond with many facets yet to sparkle.